I don’t know about y’all, but 2023 was not the year for me. That feels weird to even acknowledge, because most years I think “how will next year top this?” This isn’t to be pessimistic, just genuinely acknowledging there were some slumps in 2023 that have me gazing at the horizon for 2024 with major heart eyes.
Instead of resolutions, I’m opting to look back at some of the challenges from the past year with a fresh perspective. What did it teach me? How can I grow from this? What would have been the best response to the situation? I’m striving to make it the year I learned to overcome some of the hardest moments. With that, let’s tackle the things I’m challenging myself to leave in 2023.
23 Things to Leave in 2023
1: Feeling unworthy or undervalued. Being humble is a beautiful thing, but it shouldn’t tamper with knowing your worth. Self doubt is the key to any and everyone else doubting you, too. You are always worthy of sitting side-by-side with those you admire or with massive accomplishments.
2: Unrealistic standards, for myself and others.
3: Giving advice when people just want to vent. This is honestly one of my biggest downfalls. It’s not worth opting to voice what I feel. Your voice is way more valued when you save it for the moments people actually want to hear it. Sometimes people just want to complain, and that’s okay too. Knowing the objective from the get-go saves time and frustration when they’re complaining about the same thing a week from now.
4: Buying junk I don’t need.
5: Overextending to please or over-satisfy blossoming friendships. Instead of giving my all from the jump, I’m aiming to do less and let the process run it’s course.
6: Leaving messes, projects or responses for “the next day.” Next day me hates them even more than same day me.
7: Connecting through someone elses experiences. I’ve realized this is my way of “relating” to people. “Oh my gosh, me too!” or “WAIT, I had the same thing happen!” might feel like you’re connecting, but can also come across as needing to steal their moment or the conversation as a whole.
8: Fear of celebrating myself.
9: Prioritizing others goals, visions or needs over my own.
10: Over-talking a situation. The message ends up lost in my rambles. I’m always worried I sound mean, or that I need to fill awkward silence with more words, but I’m making a goal to cut to the chase and ending there in 2024.
11: Excusing why I didn’t have “me” time. The days I skip exercising, doing my full makeup, choosing something that makes me happy… they all add up. With 24 hours in a day, there’s no reason not to choose you, even for a few moments.
12: Letting inner peace being tampered with based on my outer circumstances.
13: The “need” to explain myself. The more you do it, the more it seems like you’re attempting to sell you on whatever you’re explaining.
14: Using time be an excuse for treatment. Length of relationships is never an excuse for the treatment you tolerate.
15: Letting feedback waiver how sure I am of my worth. This line of business quite literally requires you to “price yourself” and then sell it to others. No matter how black-and-white you try to make it, there’s a slight sting when someone cuts down on what your “value” is. Going into 2024, I’m listening to feedback but refusing to compromise the value that I know I bring… not just in work, but all situations.
16: Someone else’s opinion swaying the weight I put on situations. You know, the “wow, I can’t believe you aren’t upset” or “you’re taking this better than I would” comments? In 2024, I vow to give them less power. I feel how I feel, and that’s how I feel.
17: Putting my our family in situations that will, inevitably, cause frustration. Getting annoyed with the kids because they aren’t sitting still, frustrated that my husband isn’t excited to re-take a photo for the 13th time… Instead of taking the kids to a restaurant with a long wait, getting food to-go or planning ahead so Mario doesn’t have to take the same photo more than once is on the agenda for 2024.
18: Spending time in fear. Instead, spending it in prayer.
19: Lack of boundaries.
20: Feeling like perfection is essential. Sometimes done is better than perfect.
21: Taking family time for granted. I’ve spent too many years wishing for exactly what I have in my arms right now. How dare I let our “do more” mindset be an excuse to miss out on the few moments I have with my littles while they’re little.
22: Multitasking. This might sound weird, but my ADHD brain can physically not process taking on more than one task at a time. Somehow, I end up with 13 half completed projects and nothing truly marked off my to-do list for the day. Instead of multitasking, I’m aiming to start and finish tasks before moving to the next.
23: Giving everyone access to the same “level” of me. Acquaintances don’t deserve the same insights or vulnerability as my best friend. There’s no shame to be found in being more guarded with your heart.
Here’s to 2024.
Of all the things I opt to leave in 2023, one of them will never be my lack of gratitude for each of you. The love and appreciation I’ll always have for the community we’ve built in this corner of the internet is my happy space on some of the hardest days.
I’m craving a little feedback here, friends! Is there anything you’re itching to leave in 2023, too?
Photo session by the queen herself, Melanie Hodskins!
